Monday, May 3, 2010

Monday Flashback

On Monday, we like to reflect upon the strange shit we witnessed over the weekend, such as the man with the Empire Strikes Back lunchbox at the Replay last night. He was a member of a Missouri band called Bootheel, and after the band ripped through a fiery set of country-punk, this fellow hung around the patio drinking and carrying around the lunchbox rather daintily, not in an ironic fashion but much like an eight year old boy whose mother had packed him a nice lunch of PB&J with the crusts cut off. Richard (naturally) found himself wondering what was in this lunchbox. The guy's stash of weed, perhaps? CD's from the band? A fucking light saber? But the guy had a rather intimidating look. He was heavily tattoed, and from Missouri, and Richard imagined that any unwanted questions might lead to a lunchbox across the face, leaving your author with an impression of Yoda on his cheek. So he did not ask. But at one point he did overhear the man engaged in a nearby conversation about lunchboxes in which an older fellow fondly recalled his Man From U.N.C.L.E lunchbox and a woman recalled her Yellow Submarine lunchbox, to which the band member responded: "I'll bet that motherfucker is a collectible now."

At this point Richard suddenly remembered owning a Fall Guy lunchbox during his own childhood. Too bad he didn't have it with him at the Replay last night.

Readers, what lunchbox did you own?

Chip: "My Little Pony. Sure, it earned me a beating or two, but I thought those ponies were neat."

11 comments:

Capt. Chanute said...

I haven't made any moves yet, but I'm looking to purchase a lunchbox I saw in Sammy RyRy's movie Sorority Sluts: Iota Eta Pi. Her lunchbox. And one can only guess what I'll be putting in it...

dick in a box said...

Captain, you are always wise!

The Dr is in, Lunchbox! Bickity Bam! said...

Trans - fucking - Mittens?

FUCK NO!

FORMERS, Pansies!

Fucking Optimus Prime and shit!

And, I'm not talking, Bayformer, bionicle fucking Megan Fox... though that would be quite hot, mind you, ...but, blocky, Peterbilt, Red and Blue Optimus... still voiced by the masterful Peter Cullen! That man's voice made me much laid as a boy. What?!? I was raised in parochial school!

Fuckers!

--And now the Doctor is much laid, fuckas! YOOWWWWWWWWW! -Stryper ROOOAAAR!-

betharoni said...

I had a She-ra lunchbox back in the day. Now I have a My So-Called Life lunchbox.

beth said...

And I just read the other comments. You are seriously channeling Jason Mewes, friend. Well done!

neolithic blogger said...

We only got rocks for lunch. We didn't need no box for rocks.

Ganstalicious said...

When we rock this shit, we rock krunk!

--Dirty SOB up in yer bizzy hizzy, HUSTLA!

Keith said...

I had a Planet of the Apes lunchbox, bitches.

transmittens lunchbox! said...

Dr. X, you just gave me the best local hipster idea in ages! Oh, the joy of a 'Mittens lunch box, covered in cow clouds and sparklemittens and filled to bursting with PBR and Hamms! Everbody at the Replay will be packing one.

Also, welcome to Keith, whoever you are!

I like this place much better this way! said...

Fucking Keith know how this shit works, Clitlickas!

--So vulgar... FUCK YAH!

Anonymous said...

I think "Keith" may be a French scholar by day...and sometimes by night...

Just a guess