Tuesday, October 21, 2008

The LC Presents: Random Tales of Romance (Arkansas) / Plus, The Boys' Country Corner is Back! / Also, Chip Rescues a Baby Fox From a Prairie Fire!

In this new series, Richard presents random tales of Romance and lets you figure out their relevance to your own lives.

"In the mid-80's, Central Arkansas had two very popular mainstream country radio stations, pretty much interchangeable in terms of music. One was KSSN, "Kissin' Country," which had been around the longest and was preferred by the older crowd. The upstart station was KDUC, "the Duck," which used a lot of hilarious quacking sounds during their promos. Our shop teacher, Gary Don, preferred KSSN, but when he was out of the room, we often turned the station to "the Duck," which would go unnoticed until Gary Don heard quacking sounds later, at which point he would fly into a vicious rage, screaming, "Who in the HELL turned this to The Duck!" Those were good times. Later Gary Don was fired because he brought a rock and placed it on his desk and told everyone it was a "sex stone." When students asked what a sex stone was, he'd say, 'Oh, it's just a fucking rock.' One of the students' parents was not impressed with the joke."

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Yes indeed, the boys' lives have long been filled with country music, and today we take a look at LC-favorite Brad Paisley's "Letter To Me":

"If I could write a letter to me
And send it back in time to myself at 17
First I'd prove it's me by saying look under your bed
There's a Skoal can and a Playboy no one else would know you hid"


Chip: "These lyrics don't fully connect with me, because I read Juggs instead of Playboy, but I get his point here."

"And when you get a date with Bridgett make sure the tank is full
On second thought forget it that one turns out kinda cool"


Chip: "I think this means that he fucked her that night!"

Richard: "Notice Paisley's use of 'slant-rhyme' in these two excerpts ("bed/hid"; "full/cool"). I don't think I'm wrong in saying this is heavily influenced by Emily Dickinson."

"Each and every time you have a fight
Just assume you're wrong and dad is right"


Richard: "This song sends a dangerous message to young men that they should sublimate their own beliefs to institutions such as the family and perhaps, by extension, to the church and state."

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Over the weekend, Chip was able to rescue a cute baby fox from a prairie fire. It's pictured below. Enjoy, readers! You voted for this shit!

(Chipnote: "I was shirtless when I rescued this fox, and I will gladly share those pictures with the four of you who voted for shirtless photos!").

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