Tuesday, October 28, 2008

The Boys' Country Corner (Literature Edition)! / Plus, The Boys Recommend an Out-of-Town Event: American Royal PBR Superbull Competition!

Hopefully, the LC has proven that the songs of mainstream country artists are worthy of serious cultural consideration, but we've all been wondering something else: can they write books? Tim McGraw's first children's book, My Little Girl, is on shelves now, and it tells the touching tale of a cowboy and his daughter who spend a day together: "They stop by the farm co-op, gaze up at the clouds and play on a tire swing." Did the boys enjoy it?

Chip: "All children remember the first time their fathers took them to the farm co-op. I expect this to become a timeless children's classic."

Richard: "It's good, but I look forward to the day when Toby Keith writes a children's book, which will probably be about a cowboy who teaches Little Timmy how to put his little boot in the ass of terrorists."

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It's easy to forget sometimes, but liberal Larryville is essentially a progressive oasis in the middle of a desert of old-fashioned conservative cowtowns. One of KC's most-popular events, the American Royal, a series of rodeos and country concerts and barbecue competitions, brings us the annual PBR Superbull bull-riding contest this Sunday. And despite the associations of Larryville hipsters, PBR in this instance refers not to the sweet brown liquid of Pabst Blue Ribbon but to the Professional Bull Riding association.

Chip: "I'm hoping that a lot of hipsters get confused and believe that the competition is sponsored by their favorite beer and assume that bullriding has now become the new hipster 'sport', replacing roller derby, and that they all show up on Sunday and get the ever-loving shit kicked out of them by the shitkickers!"

1 comment:

cl.thier said...

I believe that putting your boot up the ass of terrorists is the theme of Toby Keith's new book, "Goodnight, Terrorists."