Sunday, January 25, 2009

The Boys Consider the Results of an Important New Sex Survey! / Plus, the LC's "Hick Pick" of the Day!

[Our post today is dedicated to our good friend Dr. C, who now resides out West but who once taught us so much about monkey-sex during the heyday of the weekly Quinton's 'board meetings.' Enjoy!]

Today's New York Times Magazine contains a story about Meredith Chivers' new study of human sexuality, in which volunteers were shown a series of films (heterosexual sex, sex between women, sex between men, and monkey sex...bonobo monkeys, to be specific, which contained some dubbed sounds of monkey hoots and screeches because the actual bonobos were very quiet during lovemaking). During the films, "plethysmographs" were connected to the volunteers' genitals which measured their levels of arousal. Straight men registered high levels of arousal at heterosexual and lesbian sex, with little stimulation by the male/male or monkey scenes. Straight women, on the other hand, registered arousal across the board...yes, even the monkeys got them hot.

Chip: "This sounds like a fun study to participate in, but at the same time I'm a little afraid I might get a boner while watching those monkeys fuck."

Richard: "I've often read that women are less visually stimulated than men, so perhaps it was primarily the dubbed monkey noises that turned them on. Even so, I find it inspiring to read how easily aroused women can be, and I predict this study will get us all laid immediately."

The LC suggests that you read the article, if only for lines such as these: "And with the women, especially the straight women, mind and genitals seemed scarcely to belong to the same person."


Chip: "Today, about half the population of Forttt Scottt will be making a rare pilgrimage to KC. Why? To check out one of Larry the Cable Guy's two shows at the Midland this evening. Sure, it's easy for intellectuals to scoff at such 'lowbrow rural' humor, but the truth is that Larry's trademark 'Get 'er done' has become a powerful mantra for a certain kind of person across the nation who may often feel beaten down by everyday concerns but who nonetheless soldiers through life's mundane matters with a smile and a shrug and a 'Get er' done!' We should all thank Larry, instead of making fun of him, and I predict one day his routine will be remembered as fondly as Abbott and Costello's 'Who's on first?'"


the edge & bonobo said...

I love Meredith Chivers.

our old friend klinker used to say said...

"I'd pay a quarter to watch monkeys fuck."