Sunday, March 28, 2010

Recent Concert Reviews / On-Line Talkbackers Consider K-State

Local hipsters at the Replay last night were stunned by a completely irony-free performance by former Richmond, VA punk hero turned solo folkie, Tim Barry. Yes, that sounds exactly like an Onion headline, but so what, it's accurate. Setting up his mic in the middle of the room and sometimes venturing into the crowd with his guitar, Barry captivated a small band of devoted followers with an hour's worth of earnest, passionate songs and stories about hard times among the working class.

Chip: "Are you sure that this rare sincerity wasn't itself a kind of schtick? The guy was wearing a Conway Twitty T-shirt. Surely that's ironic."

Richard: "No, Chip. That T-shirt was sincere as well."

Spotted in the crowd on this evening was legendary former Lawrence hipster John Br.ni, back in town for the evening. Of course, he was only there to see the lesser-known opening act and left long before any real emotion was shared between performer and audience.

Later in the evening, Richard and King Tosser, confused and frightened by an evening of authenticity, ventured back into a more typical "scene" at the Jackpot, where many hipsters were far more interested in the venue's new photo booth than in the bands on-stage. Tosser soon found himself engaged in a heated territorial dispute with one of Larryville's little-old-lady-scenesters (no, it was not Carol, Larryville's beloved sweet little-old-lady lesbian, but one of her friends). This lady did not approve of Tosser resting his pitcher of beer on her table, which led to this exchange:

Lady: "That is Carol's table, and this is mine. We got here early to claim them."

Tosser: "What about that table across the room, love? Is that yours too."

Richard left, laughing uncontrollably, before the dispute came to blows, but he was fairly sure Tosser could have taken the old broad in a fight.

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After KU's early exit in the NCAA tournament, an unexpected and troubling question came up in Larryville last week: is it okay to support K-State out of a sense of state loyalty, even though they are obviously a bunch of vicious in-bred fuckers? (Chip: "The question should never have come up.").

In a controversial LJ-World editorial yesterday ("It's time to back the 'Cats"), Tom Keegan urged us to put aside our hatred and wish the team well. This led, of course, to a wild talkback session.

Nutflush21 says: "Keegan, I hear they have a job opening a the Manhattan Mercury."

Otownhawker says: "I didn't even read this astonomical (however you spell it) article. This is gross. I realize no one ever reads my stupid posts but you will never see me on these boards again...Otownhawker out forever...btw Self Realist, you blow, and so do you other people who don't support the best coach in KU history."

lhohman3 says: "I hope those Wildc*nts choke on a knife blade."

(Chip: "Wildcunts! Oh, that's good! Why didn't I think of that?").

But it's packywacky88 who wins the prize for our favorite post with an explanation of why it IS okay to root for K-State: "I know of no K-Stater that would cheer, root, or say anything positive about KU. They HATE us deep to their core…..I mean deep, deep hatred, and that makes me feel special. It is simple jealousy demonstrated by our retarded cousins to the west. But…..I root for the Big 12 and when not in competition with KU, I root for the Purple Pussies. We are big enough sports fans to cheer for our cousins, even if they are not. Although…..part of me enjoys the fact that we have 5 national crowns and they have none. I would like to see them in the Final 4…..something like when you go to McDonalds and see the “special needs girl” working on the fry-o-later….you cheer her on saying “geeze, she is doing good for herself”.

1 comment:

Capt. Chanute said...

Otownhawker is likely NOT resigning from his ironic, irrelevant post on LJWorld.com. Most likely, he'll just redirect his efforts to accusing the sorostitutes of somehow bringing rape upon themselves in the student ghetto, hurling blame at The Herb Shop for corrupting the youth of Lawrence while selling simple, quirky items and sitting quietly in his dark, little computer room waiting for the statute of limitations to expire on his double count of pedophilia and pederasty. Talk to you soon Otown...