Friday, October 30, 2009

Weekend Picks for Geeks and Metalheads!

There's always plenty to do in Larryville for hipsters (PBR's at the Replay) and frat boys (date rape and AIDS jokes!*), but if you're a geek who loves video games and rarely gets laid there's often not much to do besides hang out at Astro Kitty Comics playing Magic: The Gathering and discussing which episode of BSG is the best(that stands for Battlestar Galactica, hipsters, and the consensus is: Episode 3.20, titled Crossroads, Part II).

[*Heathers reference]

But tonight at Wonder Fair local geeks can revel in a "slide-show, book-signing, and conversation" ( with John Porcellino, whose self-published King Cat Comics have delighted lonely misfits since 1989. Here's an example of his work (click to enlarge and enjoy):

Chip: "This probably comes closest to the feel of my own childhood of anything that I have yet seen apart from Diff'rent Strokes. You see, I too was often beaten up by someone named 'the Gooch.'"


The excellent masked-metal band Troglodyte takes over the Replay tonight, opening for the equally top-notch Hammerlord. Troglodyte has even been written up in the horror magazine Fangoria:

"Drawing musical influences from the likes of CARCASS, OBITUARY and ORIGIN, and hominid-horror movies such as, THE LEGEND OF BOGGY CREEK, THE PIT and NIGHT OF THE DEMON, the band has craved/slashed out its own niche as the world's first Bigfoot death-metal band. Penning such "classics" as SASQUASHED, THEY WALK AMONG US, BEATEN & EATEN, SKUNK APE-RAPE and others."

Richard: "I'll be the guy shouting for 'Skunk Ape-Rape' throughout their set."

And here's the cover of headliner Hammerlord's self-titled debut album:

Chip: "Sweet wolves!"


Anonymous said...

I would be willing to bet good, honest money that that fuzzy britches will fuck Chip with that Mjolnir she's holding.

The thought of which just makes me hungry for a ho, and steamy pot pie.

--Mmmmmm, such delicate imagery.

Anonymous said...

This is the worst place.

This is the worst place ever.

the goldheart mountaintop queen directory said...

Everyone knows that Troglodyte ripped off "Skunk Ape Rape" off of Guided By Voices' "Tractor Rape Chain". Derivative bastards.

Il Barbaro said...

That album cover is an example of what happens when little boys discover photo shop. Just toss some wolves into a random picture. They don't have to be on the ground . . . let 'em float.

Howling III: The Marsupials said...

I'm not sure Troglodyte's range of influences extends quite so far as GBV. I'd guess it extends from GWAR to maybe...Marilyn Manson.

Anonymous said...

I can but wonder why Dr. Noggy has not published this website, noting it's ultra-intellectual subject matter, depth (or dearth) of aforementioned intellectualization and it's consistently educational discussion of fucking Chip with inanimate objects (though we all know that Thor's mjollnir was as near and dear to him as any). Bravo all!

the editorial board said...

Oh, it will eventually go public (but maybe not during job search season, as we fear accusations of slander and general perversity...we have already been labeled "40 year old perverts" by those who do not understand the serious nature of our boner jokes!).

These truths we hold self-evident! said...


If America can not understand one man's fascination with shaping and crafting meaty facades of Kip's flesh rumps, baking said loaves immediately before consumating the art of fuck with them... Then I just don't know what to think.

But I will be cold and kneedeep in his fleshy ass with a grapefruit spoon before I will give up my god-granted rights to publish fan fiction devoted to it!

--Perverse, indeed?!?

Anonymous said...

I'm now in the process of finding a woman that will let me bang her 1. on camera and 2. with a bag over her head (she can, therefore, be completely ugly as long as she has an okay bod) and 3. with a picture of Chip on said bag. I can already tell you what I'll be thinking right before I squirt: SLUT!

increasingly disturbed said...

Sometimes I think Dr. X and Adam may need to open their own blog, called Chipfucking. It might not receive a book contract or anything, but it would almost certainly create a whole new genre of pornography that the world very much needs right now.

Anonymous said...

I though that's what this place was for?

More importantly, if you would just cover this fascinating new sub-culture of wanting to fuck Kip and Kip-like objects (A zaftig shrubbery, a pot roast, the great pumpkin dressed as Kip etc), we might be mollified to explore brave new facets of hipsterdumb, like not fucking Kip with gourds and related squashes.

But you need to get on that -- because I have these t-shirts getting ready to go into production... and my novelization of Harry Lupus deciding life would be better with Kip and his cock-stocking is getting serious consideration at your better XXX roadside attractions.