Chip: "If this happens, we're likely to see a lot of rowers suddenly turn up 'missing.' I mean, how could this proposal be seriously considered, given the recent surging crime rate in this city, with nightly stabbings and drive-bys?"
Richard: "I'm pretty sure none of those have been linked to the homeless, Chip."
Chip: "And I'm pretty sure you're naive."
Like most Americans, the boys have no real clue what Cinco de Mayo is actually celebrating ("Isn't it when Sancho Panza and Che Guevera liberated the Mexicans from the clutches of the dictator 'Speedy' Gonzalez?" --Chip). But nonetheless it's a fine occasion to don a sombrero, eat some queso, and get hammered on cheap margaritas ("Queso means cheese" --Richard).
The boys spent last year's Cinco de Mayo at the Sandbar and, judging from the report on that evening, they had a very nice time. Here's an excerpt: "Also spotted on this night: one of the most beautiful women yet seen in local bars, wearing a short, tight, black cocktail dress. When I see such a dress, Richard said (in his mind), the first thing I think about is removing it."
Richard: "What I meant to say was that I wanted to remove it...with my teeth."
See you on the town.