Monday, June 21, 2010

Happy Summer Solstice! / Look Who's Twittering

Readers, it's the summer solstice, and Eastsiders will be celebrating this evening with a variety of parties (Chip: "And by 'parties' they mean 'pagan rituals, many of which involve naked kickball.").

Enjoy yourselves, folks, but be careful, because this unusually hot early summer weather seems to be making local hobos even "stabbier" than usual (seriously, there is a stabbing in this town almost every fucking day!).


The boys have been very vocally skeptical of twitter (Richard: "Because it's just so stupid!"), but that doesn't prevent them from keeping tabs on numerous twitter feeds. Today we showcase a few our current favorites.

Local scoundrel and sexpert Victor Continental just began "tweeting" this morning. His first post:

"When I look down, I'm usually amazed at the size."

Follow him here:

The Bourgeois Pig remains a perpetual favorite of ours. They don't seem to have addressed the baby-in-bar scandal on the site, but their updates remain delightfully pretentious:

"The mango rum's nearly infused. Sorry it's taking so long, but we don't want to decant it before it's ready."

Tune in here for infusion-updates:

We are also grateful to the Pig for this picture, taken during a noon concert by the Lonesome Hobos on Mass. Street:

But perhaps our favorite new Twitter feed is by someone named "StudentStripper," posting from the anonymous "midwest." Her posts are often wonderfully raunchy, such as this recent entry:

"New girl was seen getting fingered during a dance. Big fight broke out in the dressing room."

She's also prone to titillating commentary regarding her own off-stage sexploits:

"role-played with the stripper and customer...endless lapdances and ended up tying him to the bedframe :)"

".Ps I get laid in less than a week and I can't fucking wait."

"Well i can hear the birds chirping. Time to masterbate and go to sleep."

Follow her here:

Dr. X, Twitter-user: "I certainly will!"

Richard: "I figured a stripper would be able to spell 'masturbate' properly."

The boys have been flirting with the idea of creating an LC-related Twitter feed lately, but we aren't sure our fans necessarily want an update each time Chip gets a boner.

Chip: "I do get an awful lot of boners."


Master Bait and Tackle said...

Perhaps StudentStripper needs, a la Virginia Wolff and AnnaUndercover, a blog of her own!

X said...

Hmmm, there seemed to bea few to few 'fucks' in my tweet. 140 characters or not, I usually like to make sure everything I say is accompanied by at least three fucks and a bitches.

And maybe a shitdicky! (That's usually applied to Kip!)

--But I will follow this tarty shrew.

show me your tweets! said...

There's a pretty large world of strippers on Twitter, it seems, and I think it's a promising book project that will involve me spending A LOT of time in titty bars.