Monday, November 2, 2009

The Boys' Favorite New Reality Show: VH1's "Sex Rehab!" / Also: Hipster Pick of the Day and Hipster Photo of the Day!

Ever since TV-Land's The Cougar ended its run the boys have been searching for a suitably sleazy reality-show replacement. Now they've found it! In the first episode of VH1's Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew, a group of "celebrity" sex addicts (such as adult-film star Penny Flame) move into a large house and take a vow not to screw or masturbate. Upon arrival, Drew and his group of "experts" confiscate all the addicts' sex toys (apparently forgetting that it's possible to both screw and masturbate without them) and engage the addicts in counseling sessions, which mostly consist of women talking about how much they enjoy screwing and masturbating ("Once I start, I might as well call in and take the day off"). One can only assume the program will lead to high drama and a massive orgy, given the fact that these are, after all, a group of sex addicts living in close coed quarters.

Chip: "Somehow I suspect this show may end up increasing the number of sex addicts in the world. I know I beat off twice before the first commercial break while looking at Penny Flame."

Richard: "I know we're supposed to feel sympathy for these people, but I came away mostly jealous. Easily the best show on television right now."

Chip: "Take that, Mad Men!"


Readers, we don't know much about the band called Electric Tickle Machine aside from the fact that their name is adorable and the Pitch offers this blurb: "With slapstick lyrics such as 'Buy a puppy/It'll make you more presentable,' the mustachioed group's performances are crowd-pleasing on multiple levels."

Isn't this enough to make you head to the Replay tonight, or will you wait till the weekend and check out the equally-adorably named Giggle Party?

Correct answer: See them both!


The boys didn't make it to the Jackpot's recent "Super Nerd Night" featuring an evening of anime and video games, but based on the following shot from A. Ruscin's slideshow, it seems like a good time. The guy seems to be trying to stifle a boner, which could have been caused by the proximity of the woman but is more likely due to the stupid alien/devil picture she's holding.


Anonymous said...

Ha. I know this guy. Is it any wonder that the hipster pic of the week is an attention-starved kickballer? His new 9-5 is the Commish of the dodgeball league. Do these fuckin hipsters ever WORK? I mean seriously; And just to reiterate, he is perpetually holding back boners in the presence of women, PBR and children. Well, maybe not children; I just threw that in to make him seem more like a pederast as the picture would seemingly suggest. Whatever. Maybe he should be on the sex addict show so he could get laid?

the guy behind the guy said...

I didn't realize this fellow was so important. Dodgeball commissioner, eh? Perhaps we should have shown him more respect.

Anonymous said...

yeah. Cleary, some guy groping at his crotch on camera is an important bastard.

ESPN Ocho! said...

Perhaps he's only holding his crotch because he was hit with a dodgeball? Let's not jump to conclusions here!

Anonymous said...

If that's the case, maybe this lucky young lady got to see his "swollen member" in the squeaky-clean jackpot bathrooms. Or he got flat out rejected. So badly that he sought out Chip immediately for solace and a little pity fuck.