Monday, August 24, 2009

This Week in Kansas News: No Freak-Dancing, Please! / Also, This Week in Campus News: New Alcohol Policies/ And Chip's Photo of the Week

The boys' eyes were naturally drawn to this startling headline in today's LJ-World: "Schools crack down on 'freak dancing.'" They are referring to what the kids today called "grinding," and Wichita area administrators have had just about enough of it:

"It was to the point where I thought, 'If a member of the community came up here and watched our kids dancing right now, would we be proud of this?' And the answer was no."

The schools have placed "no grinding" posters throughout the halls, but administrators say their efforts are not succeeding.

Chip: "Dancing has always been forbidden in Forttt Scottt, along with sex while standing up, which can sometimes be mistaken for dancing. It wasn't until I moved to Larryville and went to Abe and Jake's that I learned to grind. I've always thought it helped people learn useful sex moves."

Richard: "I agree with Chip and believe that good grinding skills should be taught in any worthwhile sex-ed class."

Chip: "It probably is, at KU, at least in Dennis Dail.y's course."


In the wake of last semester's on-campus alcohol-related deaths, KU has instituted a mandatory on-line alcohol awareness course that must be completed by all students under the age of 22. While the boys favor this policy, they also can't help cynically imagining scenarios in which frathouses throw parties in which the members see who can pass the course after downing the most Jaeger shots.


Chip: "In the midst of Larryville's incessant hipsterism, with its PBRs and its 'sparklemittens' and its ukuleles, we see this lone man picking a guitar on a trailerbed. I don't know about you, but I take comfort in that."*

*That last line is, of course, a Big Lebowski reference, a film that Chip has only seen in its edited for television version, which replaces Walter's famous repeated line "This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass" to the more audience-friendly, if baffling, 'This is what happens when you find a stranger in the Alps'".


It pains me to say said...

This is one area where Duke has shown itself to be superior to KU. Instead of trying to blame students for binge drinking and deaths, Duke has tried to normalize the behavior by commissioning a study to show that Baby Boomers are binge drinkers too and that they may also die from drink.

KU! said...

But we still must hate Duke with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns (which still remains less powerful than our hatred of Mizzou and K-State).