Chip: "But would I remain in persona or would I let listeners meet the real me?"
Richard: "Let's worry about that when the time comes, Kip. I mean, Chip."
Verdict: three out of four Shiner Bock Monday night beer specials (we're docking one Bock because no one ever offered us one of those free posters we were supposed to get for being one of the first 30 in the door).
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Readers, there's a LOT of information on the web, and not all of it gives us a boner, but we were very aroused yesterday upon discovering a list at the AV Club of 19 films and television episodes that open with sex scenes. At the #1 position is a nice choice: Laurel Canyon. Indeed, any film that opens with Kate Beckinsale having an orgasm is aces in our book). Some of our other favorites on the list are Betty Blue (which played an important role in young Richard's artsy-film awareness), the "Right Place, Wrong Time" episode of HBO's Treme ("There may be no bolder opening shot on television this year than a tight close-up of Wendell Pierce’s thrusting ass at the beginning of Treme’s third episode."), and the Japanese film called The Wayward Cloud:
"She lies on a bed, naked from the waist down, with half the watermelon positioned between her legs. What follows is one of the most inexplicably outré “sex scenes” of all time, as Tsai’s usual lead actor, Lee Kang-sheng, proceeds to lick, finger, and otherwise molest the woman via the watermelon, as if she actually had a giant fruit for genitalia. (Even when he finally screws her, he’s wearing the watermelon rind as a hat.)"
Chip: "I have GOT to try this."
The AV Club article is called "Start With a Bang" (get it? get it?!). Go here to read it, watch some of the scenes, and adjust your Netflix queue accordingly: