Friday, February 6, 2009

Larryville vs. KC Art! / Plus, the LC's Hick Pick of the Weekend!

The Percolator is widely acknowledged as the place in Larryville for "local bohemia at play" (LJ-World), but a new gallery in KC's Crossroads Arts District is poised to give the Perc a run for its money. The "Slap-n-Tickle (me)" gallery has a major "erotic art opening" tonight featuring more than 30 artists from KC and New York along with a burlesque performance and a fashion show. Top that, Percolator! Their website proclaims that the gallery is also open for "special appointments."

Chip: "Perhaps the 'special appointments' are to provide a little private 'gentleman's time' with the erotic paintings. I think it's safe to say we've all been turned on by a painting at one time or another--The Mona Lisa, for instance, always gives me a boner--but have found it impossible to surreptitiously beat off with other people milling about nearby. The Slap-n-Tickle may have solved that problem."

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Like all real men, the boys enjoy hunting and eating animals, and you may well find them this weekend at nearby Tonganoxie's "Squirrel Scramble," a squirrel hunting tournament which in its third year has warranted a front page story in today's LJ-World which will no doubt elicit a major outcry from Larryville's anti-hunting activists (who have recently been stalking local editorial pages in protest of the LJ-World's photos of hunters modeling with their dead deer). But lest you think the 'scramble' is a wasteful activity, the article notes that most hunters do indeed eat the squirrels and even use their tails to make fishing lures.

Chip: "They use all parts of the squirrel just as Native-Americans used all parts of the buffalo."

Richard: "My favorite quote in the article is this: "It's getting to be a big thing around here. Go out in the woods for 20 bucks; you can't beat it." Back in Arkansas, we hunted squirrels for free."

1 comment:

squirrel scared shitless said...

I like the appeal to Native Americans as a way of getting people off of their backs.

"We're like the noble savages who once inhabited this great land, and from whom we stole it so we could have our Annual Squirrel Hunt! Git 'er done!"