"Man I swear I'm on top like the attic
Yeah bitch, I be with my dog like Shaggy
And we stay clean but get dirty like Harry
Flyer than bluebirds, cardinals and canaries
Fuck me, I'm all about "Oui" like Paris"
But in the Midwest, we've got our own private Wayne, and his name is Tech N9ne. N9ne makes his triumphant return to Larryville tonight, an occasion that always makes the town's less-progressive white folks a bit nervous. The boys are expected to be on hand tonight, watching the sorostitutes sing along to N9ne's songs such as "Fuck 'em girl," a powerful celebration of female sexuality that recalls the best of Sex and the City:
"She’s goin’ out to find a thick stout to out her dig, that dress’ fittin’ catcher’s mitten is out there big."
Chip: "Is the 'catcher's mitten' her ass?"
But where should the high-brow crowd go while the kids are having their fun? How about to a 'clown ballet' in KC called "The Coppelia Project," which "follows the quest of Dr. Coppelius-Coppola, an inventor on the verge of creating the world’s first automaton... Presented in red nose and full of foibles and folly, the piece grapples with the question of beauty and where it lies; if the eye of the beholder cannot find it… does it exist?" (Lawrence.com).
Richard: "Can one perform ballet in those ridiculous clown shoes?"
Chip: "I'm as scared of ballet as I am of clowns. This is the stuff of nightmares. I'd feel safer at the Tech N9ne show."