Monday, December 1, 2008

The Boys Discuss "Australia" in their Weekly Box-Office Report / Plus, the LC Christmas Gift Guide, Vol. I / Also, the UDK's "Top of the Hill" Awards

People's "Sexiest Man of the Year," Hugh Jackman, couldn't quite deliver a number one opening for the epic Australia this weekend, but it had a respectable fifth-place showing for such a long film.

Richard: "During a packed screening I attended on Saturday, a woman in the audience let out a loud wolf-whistle during one of the shirtless Jackman scenes, which got a big laugh from many audience members."

Chip: "When women are sexist it's considered cute and funny, but if I were to whistle at Nicole Kidman during that film I'd be looked at askance and considered a pervert. Why is this? I believe it has something to do with feminism. But the result is that I prefer to watch films at home, in my underwear, and whistle all I want at the pretty girls in them."

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It's December 1, readers, which means it's almost Christmas, and the LC's goal this season is to consider various new products that might prove just right for someone on your list. First off is a new tobacco product: Camel Snus.

The boys, like many rural grad students, grew up dipping skoal and chewing tobacco ("We called it 'chaw.' "--Chip), but they were met with disapproving looks when they brought spitoons into their graduate seminars. This product seems perfect for them. The AP says:

"Snus – Swedish for tobacco, rhymes with "noose" – is a tiny, tea bag-like pouch of steam-pasteurized, smokeless tobacco to tuck between the cheek and gum. Aromatic to the user and undetectable to anyone else, it promises a hit of nicotine without the messy spitting associated with chewing tobacco. Just swallow the juice."

Chip: "I use snus when I'm teaching, but I still dip snuff back home, because it's tougher."








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Today's University Daily Kansan weighs in on the year's best with it's "Top of the Hill" awards. And receiving the award for "Best Overall Bar" and "Best Bar Customer Service" is...Quinton's.

Chip: "It just feels really great to have your own personal feelings validated by the masses. I'd like to say thanks to God, for allowing it to be built and thrive; and thanks to myself, for going there a lot; and most of all thanks to the waitresses, for making this all possible and being so hot, day in and day out."

Richard: "The Replay was voted third in the 'Best Overall Bar' category but I wish it wasn't there at all, because I don't want ungraduates knowing about it."

6 comments:

Dr. Candelaria said...

I can't believe Quinton's won for best bar customer service.

Although there were a couple of gals there who gave us good service, it was never quite as good as we might have liked.

And, with a couple of notable exceptions, the bartenders were definitely poor on customer service.

And they kept changing their drink specials.

All in all, poor customer service, although I guess if the competition is Louise's and the Red Lyon, then maybe.

Dr. Candelaria said...

Oh, and Hugh Jackman's crowning as the sexiest man or whatever is totally bogus. Although he is attractive (very attractive by some women's accounts), he's just run-of-the-mill hollywood attractive with nothing really special to recommend him. People is just schilling for Australia.

Anonymous said...

Chip defended the award last night by claiming that it was a "service" of the waitresses simply to allow the customers to look at them, irregardless of how they performed their more typical "waitressy" duties.

Personally, I will say this for the service there: it's the only place in town we've ever discussed orgasms with the waitresses.

Australia is dull. Jackman never even boxes a kangaroo.

Anonymous said...

As a long-time defender of Quinton's, I would argue the voters clearly had a more Chipian definition of service in mind than the typical definition.

Oh, and you should make Quinton's your friend on MySpace!

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=98501382

Anonymous said...

I'd like to make Quinton's my "friend with benefits."

Anonymous said...

I prefer my bar "friends with benefits" with less gnats.