Monday, June 16, 2014

Best Of Lawrence Recap: We Won! / Plus, Selected Tweets From Our Imaginary #LFKPD Twitter Event

As many of our readers know, the Best of Lawrence awards ceremony was held last Thursday at Abe and Jake's as the mighty Kaw raged by outside, and our Twitter account @LarryvilleLife came up victorious as first place winner of "Best Local Facebook, Twitter, or Other Social Media."  Why are these categories lumped together?  And how in the hell did we beat the Facebook phenomenons in the "Fuck You, I'm From Kansas" gang?  We have no idea. But thanks to everyone who voted for us!  The video ceremony will (hopefully?) pop up on-line at some point and then you can see Richard (or is it Chip?) introduce the "Arts and Entertainment" category while wearing our favorite disguise: a PBR box.  And there's also a great LFK-centric parody of the Sopranos opening credits sequence   And Tom Keegan doing a bunch of silly shit.

But our favorite category this year was "Best Celebrity," which went to the motley crew of Bill Self (1st place), Dennis (2nd), and Tyler Gregory (3rd).  The LJ-World really blew an opportunity by not having those three pose for a winner's photo together.


On Friday, we decided to celebrate our Twitter victory with a preposterous Twitter-event, inspired by the popular KC police tweetalongs.  We asked some of our funniest LFK friends to join us in live-tweeting an imaginary evening with Lawrence's finest and the criminal mischief they might encounter on Friday the 13th during  a full moon (and also a "honey moon.").  You can read all the tweets at the hashtag #LFKPD but we're going to offer up a few of our favorites here today from the most active participants:  Chris Nelson, Will Averill, Laura Larson, and ourselves.  Thanks, folks! 

Tweets from @RoboNelson79:

 "Danger Bob vs Paw" riot at Bottleneck leads to looting of Hobbs Taylor Lofts. Pachamama's watches, comforted by smooth jazz.

Anthony Jimboy brought in, 48 Hours style, to help investigate attempted Wheatfields robbery.

East Lawrence disagreement over proper composting technique leads to chicken coop fire. PD, FD & Sociology Major on scene.

19th and Haskell. Yeah, what can you do . . . *sigh*

Officers respond to misdemeanor bogarting at 14th & Tenn. "It's puff, puff pass, sir" they were heard to explain to the suspect.

 Kaw River Midnight Mile Swim ends in foreseeable yet unavoidable tragedy. "Sorry, we don't have boats." -LPD spokesperson

Tweets from @willaverill:

 Police arrest for hot, naked 3-on-1 trivia. filming, groping.

(reply from Chris Nelson:   "That is NOT how Alan was meant to be used!" -horrified detective)

 Authorities still searching for the Paradise Cafe. If seen please contact the 90's.

Police called to to investigate the rise of a large building blotting out the sun

would like to wish everyone a Happy Father's Day and remind you to please NOT STAB YOUR FAMILY.  

Tweets from @prairielaura

 6th and Monterey Way: couple cited for "insufficient irony" while wearing acid-wash jeans

 disturbance reported at 15th & Vermont. Disagreement over depth of caramel notes in homebrewed beer. Officers en route to weigh in.

 report of bike stolen from patio. Perp described as having handlebar mustache, riding penny-farthing

 Victim apprised that "you'll need to be more specific than than that if you want us to catch this guy."

 Tuvan throat-singing flashmob reported, 8th & Massachusetts. Backup requested

fisticuffs reported . physical dispute over true identity of "AAA," high-score holder for "Mars Attacks!"

Tweets from @larryvillelife

Reminder: due to full moon and Friday the 13th, stabbings are considered LOW priority tonight.

7:23 pm. Large busker brawl at 8th and Mass. Suspects escaping on unicycles and pogo sticks.

 Drunken handcuffed children are being led out of Shot's. Eight year olds, dude.

 Several reports of werewolf sightings on KU West Campus. But it's probably only mountain lions.

 Receiving reports that has suspended all laws tonight, inspired by The Purge. Do NOT cross the bridge!

 12:11 am. . Moon dance in progress. It's fantabulous but illegal. Requesting backup.

 Jimboy spotted outside Basil Leaf Cafe, yelling for Joe's Bakery donuts.

Jimboy has been sighted walking west on 9th. Officers have set up a perimeter around Muncher's. The ceiling is secured.

 A series of "donut traps" have been set out around 9th and Iowa in an effort to intercept Jimboy on his march to Muncher's.

 A rare happy ending: Jimboy shares a cream cheese donut with his arresting officers at Muncher's. 

  Full moon orgy in progress in . Very flabby. Harmless. Nothing to see here. Let 'em fuck.

 We've been stabbed. This was inevitable.


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